My son...We love him with all our heart. Before having him, we never knew how much life would change with him in our lives. He makes EVERYTHING so worth it. Our existence and everything we do is a reflection of him...for him.

This blog is to inform our family of what is going on with us at this time. Where I'm getting with this blog is sad one... but one that will be look upon one day and remember how far we have come.

Hayden has been going to West University for speech therapy- twice a week for 30 minute sessions with about 5-6 other older kids. And for various reasons...we did not 'click' with the special education teacher. She was cold in our eyes... but I'm sure in her eyes... she is just 'frank and to the point.' She would essentially ask us to drop him off crying and shut the door. She didn't feel warm and fuzzy like we felt she should have been with kids with disabilities. After a few weeks with him, give or take (approximately 6 sessions due to holidays and such) she told Steve she wanted him tested by the school psychologist for other impairments. Steve, as any other parent, wasn't receptive to this and in fact told her she wasn't with him long enough and not to give up on him and be patient. Then he asked her did she review his file and the 3 other psychologist evaluations and speech therapy notes... she was perplexed and a bit offended by his tone as if he was questioning her. Well that didn't make the matter better... Well holidays came around added with teacher in-service days... and we did not take him back. We instead went to the HISD special education department and inquired about other services available to him. To make a story short... we moved him to another school close by, Condit Elementary, equally a great school.

Transfers in hand, Hayden met with Mrs. Bailey at Condit Elementary. She meets with him one and one and he is definitely more receptive to her. She is patient and has a friendly smile. And she gives hugs :)

Talking to Mrs. Bailey she brings up AUTISM spectrum. She is concerned. My eyes quickly fill up with tears. She recommends more testing and placing him in a PPCD (Preschool program for children with disabilities). He is turning 4 soon and his speech is severely limited. In fact she notes that he has no urge to talk. AUTISM SPECTUM, it is called a 'spectrum' now because Autism is not what most people think of kids rocking and swinging their arms... its a spectrum and encompasses a broader, more widespread abnormalities. She has only been with him shortly and notices 'low facial tone' and the inability for him to say certain things. The low facial tone.... I don't know... but we know he can't seem to say things that start with "M" like mommy. That is why is calls me "Ya Ya." This is probably more of the APRAXIA (which have accepted), where essentially his speech problem is due to motor issues where the movements of his mouth muscles, tongue, palate are not developed for speech. Yes he does have many characteristic of Autism... but I'm sure I could fit in to several different profiles as well.

Navigating through this tough one. What are our options? We can let her go ahead and get the school specialist to test him... but then that will declare with a "disability." According to her, once he is tested this disability follows him for at least 3 years. Do I want him labeled and put into a class away from mainstream kids? Will it benefit him or could it hinder him more? What if we don't want him in a class with other physically and mentally disabled kids. She couldn't give me a straight answer. What scares me is urgency in her tone... "kids have a small window to develop their speaking skills" and we feel we are missing it.

Steve and I have discussed it and decided to keep his therapy separate from the school and do it privately. We have been given a great referral from our patient who's own grandchild was in the same exact situation and now "you can't shut the kid up"... Sessions are 1 hour 2-3 times a week. We could only wish the same for Hayden. We are also going to sign him up for a summer program with the University of Houston Speech and Communications Department. This seems to be a great program with graduates under the discretion of pathologist for 2 hours twice a week.

Is he autistic? In my eyes he is not... and I will not allow him to be labeled as such. In my field as a chiropractor, I may see a patient with a Lumbar Disc pathology or Lumbar Spondylosis (which are more severe diagnosis) than back pain. Does it change the way I treat a patient... NO. And I realize there are some diagnosis that need to be addressed differently. But in case of Autism versus speech disorders, the treatment is similar. So we will proceed to go forward with more aggressive speech therapy.

Highlights... Hayden has kicked the pacifier- which is the culprit in our eyes of some of his deficits. Included in this is our amazing ability to understand what he wants (not good because he doesn't voice it) and our over nurturing as parents.

This blog has been sitting on my computer for 3 days now.... perhaps over thinking it and not wanting to disclose too little or too much... but I felt this was the easiest way to let the people who care for us and Hayden know what is going on with us.